Vendetta

Lying in my bed trying to sleep
Having a hard time even if it’s wink
I cannot stop my self to think things so deep
As I plan my days and mark it with an ink

I’m still preparing my self for the events to come
That I know isn’t pleasant and assuring
Making me think too much of all the sum
For me to know if everything is foreseeing

The rest is still to come and I need to be ready
For unlike before I wasn’t, so I see the results
Never been so bothered with anxiety
For the thoughts that rises are sometimes insults

Now… guess I’ll make things big
For me to reach the goal that I have indeed
Vengeance is what really motivates me in this dig
That I cannot seem to forget even if I bleed

I’m trying to turn into righteousness
But I want to take my revenge so badly
Hopefully in the days to come, I’m still with humbleness
For if not then the grudge that I have is deadly

My Feelings Defined

As the night carries me to sleep
I hope to dream of you as I fall asleep
Your smile that hunts my thoughts
And your long black hair, I want to touch

As I close my eyes I see you
Till I wake up I think of you
I wasn’t ready to be in love again
But when I found you it all began

My heart before was crushed so bad
And putting it back together is all I had
I lost every single bit of me
And fallen from where I was used to be

I made too much friends to forget the pain
Kept my self busy and set goals to attain
But when I saw you, a sudden wind of change
You just blew me away and all my plans rearrange

I was not sure on how to tell you before
That I was contented just to see you more and more
But it occurred to me, to at least tell you my feelings
That I have this huge crush on you, this is so revealing…

Sometimes I have no strength to come near you
For my tongue twist when talking with you
Hopelessly I’m bewitch by your charm
So conscious that even if it’s cold I feel so warm

I’m sorry and forgive me for being like this
Trying to be close to you, I don’t wanna be dismiss
All I wanted is to know you more
And maybe if love comes it will be forevermore

Awakening

My next move to self renewal
Is to find a solid ground to stabilize my status
To regain my pride and stop this withdrawal
From being naïve and being hiatus

The moment I have realize this
Makes it easy for my logical reasoning not to miss
Being sulking up too long, and now it’s over
The new me started to become the drover

I already acknowledge this before
But to my hearts content it was neglected
I followed my heart and lose my core
Now is a different story, it should be perfected

Need to find reasons for my self to exist
For the old reason was nothing but a twist
Guess that I was still lingering, that was long gone
That took me too long to realize, that was not the one

Simply thanks to life beacons with what I had
To comply to the things that are at hand
Surly I need to erase the past that hurts
A memory of everything great and worst…

The Big Step

Guess I made progress today
To make something not so usual, a holiday!
I just overcome one of my fears
Like I surpassed a bit of my worries to be clear

I never expected to make it
I was still speechless, I was in heat
Surprised that I reach out once more
That the last time was so unsure

May be I’m still tied to the old bond I had
That makes it hard to move up on this step, I feel bad
I can only cross forward and that’s all I need
For that’s the only thing for me to do indeed

As I reach out for my self’s own happiness
As I gamble everything I have left to emptiness
I cannot guarantee it would be good or bad
As long as I tried and gave may best to add

Faith is now what I have to hold on too
For that’s what left for me to have in times so blue
I can only wish to acquire a blank memory of before
So that I can live my life once more…

Longings...

Today as I unfold my feelings
I know that this will be a new beginning
As I say the emotions that I always hide
And try to express it with all of my might

From the day that I first saw you
I knew I’ve fallen, for you that’s true
I tried to come near you but it was always in vain
I was scared nor being naïve, I was afraid of pain

As the day passes that I haven’t confess my thoughts
I felt this aching inside of me that I want to sought
I wanted to talk to you and know you more, that was the catch
So I tried to be with you, but being with you is too much

I was so nervous being with you, even if I’m trying to act cool
That I’m so happy that I cannot explain when I’m with you at school
I just can’t help to stare at you and watch your eyes meet mine
Because I cannot get the courage to tell you I like you, my self I want to define

So now as I gave you this short indention of my self
For you to know my actions really can tell and be felt
As I try to capture the exact feelings and put it into words
I hope that letting you know how I feel, can change my world

Withstand

A few Seconds of mornings…
Is one of the best moments in my life
For it’s where you haven’t remembered anything
The feeling of worrying nothing, even your strife

Starting the day right thinking nothing
Lying on my bed half awake
I wonder what will I see today in my stretching’s
Recalling all my duties as I watch day break

Looking outside my window are clouds
Seeing how peaceful the world revolves
And the stars that slowly fades with out a sound
Makes me see that every thing has a resolve

I may never know what will be given for tomorrow
Nor the days and future to come in between
But surly I know I want to end my sorrow
And make the best out in all I do to be keen…

So now as I sit at the side of my bed
Still murmuring on my pillow
Guess mornings are gifts, for I have awakened my silly head
And enlighten by the sun to make me stronger to grow